THE MONKEY RANCH provides original animal stories and creative content for entertainment and education.
THE MONKEY RANCH provides original animal stories and creative content for entertainment and education.
Welcome back to The Monkey Ranch! I’ve been missin’ y’all, and I know y’all been missin’ me too.
We’ve talked ‘bout a whole lotta things since y’all been visitin’ me here at The Monkey Ranch, but somehow, we ain’t got ‘round to one of the most important: eatin’. Now, eatin’ covers a lot—catchin’ food, buyin’ food, stealin’ food (not that I’d ever admit to that), cookin’ food, and the one thing that keeps folks up at night—goin’ hungry.
Lucky for us, hunger ain’t ever been a problem ‘round here—for the two-legged, the four-legged, or even the jake-legged (I’ll explain that one later).
Today, though, we talkin’ ‘bout a dish so sacred in the South, folks might just fight over it: Liver Hash.
Now, before we get to cookin’, let me tell y’all how this recipe nearly got me killed.
My father-in-law, Mr. Hoyt, was one fine man—tough as an old oak, but a good soul. He also had one of the most guarded liver hash recipes this side of the Mason-Dixon. One day, he decided to share it with me.
Well, his daughter (my wife) just about lost her mind. Said that if her daddy went ‘round givin’ out family secrets like that, the only way to keep it safe was to put me in the ground. Next thing I knew, she was stormin’ into the house and comin’ back out with his pistol!
Now, here’s where fate stepped in. In all her fussin’, she stepped right on the dog. That ol’ hound latched onto her leg like his life depended on it! She went runnin’ back in the house, hollerin’ and cursin’ the dog, callin’ him every name in the book.
That dog got ice cream every day for a week after that.
But I digress.
For those of y’all who ain’t familiar, Liver Hash is a Southern delicacy—a must-have when you cookin’ a whole hog on a pit. It’s served over rice like gravy, right next to barbecue and green beans.
Now, don’t go confusin’ Liver Hash with Liver Puddin’—that’s a whole different ballgame. Liver Puddin’ is thick, sliceable, and usually eaten for breakfast with grits. Liver Hash, though? It’s loose, rich, and meant to be poured over rice like a good Sunday blessin’.
Alright, let’s get to cookin’.
Start by throwin’ everything into a big ol’ pot—an 80-quart stainless steel one does the trick. Set it on a propane jet burner, fill it with water, and bring it to a rollin’ boil. A regular burner? Forget it. You’ll be there all day.
Let it boil till the meat falls clean off the bone. For me, that’s ‘round six hours. While it’s boilin’, you can take a nap, wash some clothes, or just sit on the porch thinkin’ ‘bout life.
Now listen up, ‘cause this part is critical. Mr. Hoyt made sure to write this in big, bold letters:
“Wash the livers THOROUGHLY. Get ALL the blood out. No exceptions.”
Here’s how ya do it:
Yep, gray. Takes about a day and a half to get it right.
As for the hearts, just cut ‘em open and rinse the blood out. No need to soak.
Once the meat’s done boilin’, let it cool for an hour, then pour off the water.
Now comes the fun part—grindin’.
You could use a hand-cranked grinder like the old days, but I use an electric grinder ‘cause, well, I like keepin’ my arms attached. Run everything through the grinder: the butts, the livers, the hearts—every last bit.
Throw all that ground-up meat back into the pot. Now, we season:
Just barely cover it with water and bring it to a gentle simmer for 45 minutes. Keep tastin’ and adjustin’ till it’s just right. The final texture should be juicy and loose, like a good, pourable gravy.
Once it’s done, scoop that fresh, homemade liver hash into small containers.
Now, here’s the thing: Liver Hash is a love-it-or-hate-it kinda deal. If your friends and family love it, they’ll treat you like Santa Claus. If they don’t? Well, they’ll smile real nice and pretend to be grateful. Either way, you win.
‘Round here, we make our Liver Hash between Thanksgiving and Christmas and hand it out as Christmas gifts. Nothin’ says “Merry Christmas” like a warm bowl of hash and a belly full of barbecue.
And speakin’ of Christmas—I got a dog waitin’ on his ice cream.
MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM ALL OF US HERE AT THE MONKEY RANCH!
The full written recipe will be up soon on The Monkey Ranch Recipe Page. Stay tuned!
2 1/2 – 3 lbs. Catfish Filets
8 slices (thin) streak-of-lean or “cover the bottom of pan with thin slices. then, that’s enough.”
Fry out the streak-of-lean. Remove from pan & drain. Saute onion in some of the fat. Pour off the rest. Add Catsup, tomato soup and water, Salt & pepper as you please. Simmer for 30 — 45 minutes. Add catfish filets and cook for only a few minutes. Drop in crumble up side meat (I use bacon), this adds thickness and flavor. Serve over rice or fresh slices of bread.
**This can also be made using bream or bass instead of catfish.
~ Mrs. Margaret
Mix meal, flour, salt and baking soda. Stir in milk and water until smooth. Drop by serving spoon into hot oil in skillet’ (like pancakes). Brown on both sides.
Fry out bacon. Saute onions, bell pepper and celery in small amt. of bacon drippings. Add other ingredients. Let cook slowly until thick. Add peas, mushrooms and minced bacon just before serving. Serve over rice. Serves 12 – 15.
~ Mrs. Margaret
